Givethanks

SHREE HARI'S GOAL: Writing Down 10,008 Appreciations by 2029

1. I am grateful that there are 58 Sikh Gurdwaras in California 
2. I am grateful that God is One
3. I am grateful for my Bear Dance brothers
4. I am grateful 50 Cent survived being shot 9 times and has helped a lot of people have jobs
5. I am grateful for Sikh Langar 
6. I am grateful that the Amritsar Sikh Gurdwara in Punjab feeds 200,000 people a day and has 3,000 dishwashers
7. I am grateful for Harbin hot springs and chanting mantras in them
8. I am grateful Shree Maa is adept at silence 
9. I am grateful for Dr. Paul True and his accepting what is
10. I am grateful to bow down to God on my knees often and do full body prostrations with my head on the ground to keep my self conceited haughty fickle nature down and dissolving into the ocean of love like a salt doll at sea dropped off a sailing loop by a seasoned mariner
11. i am grateful to attend the 2am wahe guru simran here at the Tracy Sikh Gurdwara Prakash and amazed by their 2am to 7am daily meditation schedule 
12. I am grateful Sikhs are so amazing at serving Langar food to so many people 
13. I am grateful Guru Nanak Dev is one of my many spiritual fathers
14. i am grateful I chanted over 200,000 mantras inside Siskiyou County jail 
15. I am grateful I sang many Bear Dance songs inside Siskiyou County jail
16. I am grateful I will shoot many emails during a conflict rather than deploying physical violence and court retribution punishments
17. i am grateful for my beloved 24 gurus in the lineage of Avadhuta Dattatreya 
18. I am grateful for the constant love of Mother Earth and Mother Africa
19. i am grateful I have rennounced the Hindu caste system and confining myself to one guru's box
20. i am grateful that Satyananda taught me that having a sankalpa can help me overcome a conflict 
21. I am grateful I can change my attitude and start over any time I want and pick myself up and dust myself off anytime I want
22. I am grateful I feel fresh after staying up for a 2am meditation on Wahe guru with my Sikh family at Tracy Gurdwara
23. i am grateful I warned the perverts at the Divine Mother Hindu temples that if they do more of those sexual batteries on people they are gonna get their hands chopped off and get castrated. The Old Testament of the Holy Bible recommends chopping off hands, castrations, and beheadings during war.
24. i am grateful I am also trained in Gandhian Nonviolence activism and I am versatile between war tactics and peace tactics
25. i am grateful for my Nihang Singh Sikh Kanga for honor and protection 
26. I am grateful the Sikhs taught me to carry a knife in my pocket to prevent sexual violence in the community 
27. I am grateful that Shree Maa, Amma, Swami Satyananda, and Swami Dayamritananda are some of my greatest teachers of all time, in part because we have a great Dharma battle going 
28. I am grateful to prayer, chant, cold plunge, and exercise by Swami's Beach at Yogananda's Self Realization Fellowship in Encinitas, CA
29. I am grateful that the Hindu Divine Mothers Amma and Shree Maa and their Hindu Swamis and their Rich Coordinators are the most difficult obnoxious button pushing people I've met since 2008
30. Grateful for Raw Salmon
31. Grateful for the Six Step House in Encinitas, CA
32. I am grateful Swami Satyananda Saraswati of www.shreemaa.org is very stubborn and won't agree to Restorative Justice Systems
33. I am grateful I have expressed myself very fully on email to many Hindus and my friends on email for 15 years
34. I am grateful that Swami Dayamritananda Puri of www.amma.org is very stubborn and won't agree to Restorative Justice Systems
35. I am grateful for morning sun rays
36. i am grateful Jesus saved me when I tried to strangle myself 6 times 
37. I am grateful I pray to be divorced from self pity, dishonesty, and self seeking
38. i am grateful for baby Bannanas
39. i am grateful for reggae mantra music
40. i am grateful to have a pillow
41. i am grateful to shower whenever I want
42. i I am grateful that some things just don't work out too good and some doors close
43. I am grateful to challenge the caste system of Hinduism 
44. I am grateful that Amma's and Shree Maa's promises haven't come true yet
45. i am grateful that some prayers just don't get answered 
46. I am grateful for all wealth and prosperity to serve God
47. i am grateful for beach showers
48. I am grateful for ocean cold plunges
49. i am grateful my emails are evolving into blogs, podcasts, books, standup comedy writing, tv shows, and movies
50. i am grateful my soul lives all over the universe 
51. i am grateful I got to worship and pray at the Rock Church today in San Diego and listen to a familiar message from Pastor Miles
52. I am grateful I got to go pray and make an offering to Avadhuta Dattatreya today at the Shirdi Sai Baba Cultural Center in Miramar today and perform mantra japa
53. I am grateful I am veering away from using my writing talents on email and working to shift my focus to this blog, book writing, standup comedy writing, taking a creative writing class, writing a Pod Cast show called "Iron Bar of Restraint" on Talking Chit TV, and eventually writing a movie
54. I am grateful I got to go meditate at the Temple of Joy in Encinitas, CA today and perform mantra japa and offer rose petals to the Divine Mothers in the form of Durga, Kali, and Saraswati as well as Shiv, Neem Karoli Baba, Yogananda, Babaji, Krishna, Jesus, Ganapati, Vishnu, and Hanuman
55. I am grateful Shree Maa and Swami Satyananda Saraswati intentionally have pushed all my buttons and got under my skin to churn up all my darkness and negativity 
56. I am grateful there are lots of ways to reach self realization besides Hindu rituals
57. i am grateful I am fighting to stop the dharma battle with the Hindus over the sexual misconduct that goes on at their ashrams
58. i am grateful to be sober today 
59. I am grateful I gave up the divine mother Hindu monk path because it lacks the integrity, compassion, restorative justice, kindness, warmth, unconditional love that I need
60. i am grateful god is so controlling with the free will
61. i am grateful I fight hard for social justice 
62. I am grateful to eat pizza and think of god
63. i am grateful I am careful for what i say to certain people
64. i am grateful I am very authentic with Hindus to help them not be so fickle
65. i am grateful to have new dress clothes for job interviews 
66. I am grateful to paddle around on the surf board today around sunset and feel Mother Ocean's yin energy overpower my being
67. i am grateful to have a positive job interview with a company selling windows and paint coating and I learned a lot about how the remodeling industry works in CA and how people can get tax credits to pay for remodels
68. i am grateful that all the time I spent with Shree Maa and Satyananda seems to have ruined my life which is an opportunity to begin anew
69. i am grateful I supported a friend today who got into a terrible car accident 
70. i am grateful be aware that i need a new firm resolution in my life but I'm not sure what it is that i know i can stick to yet so i am thinking about it
71. i am grateful i had to set some painful yet firm boundaries with Shree Maa and Satyananda today because i am tired of receiving emotional abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse, spiritual abuse, and retribution abuse from them and people in their lineage
72. i am grateful to stop and rest today when i felt angry, lonely, and tired to HALT
73. i am grateful for the few material possessions that i have
74. i am grateful to have a van and a motel room today
75. i am grateful to have a father who keeps his promises
76. i am grateful to keep a distance from Amma and Her lineage because I have received too much emotional and sexual abuse from people around her
77. i am grateful to be back in touch with my Bear Dance family community 
78. I am grateful to make a Interbeing Coaching feedback form to welcome constructive criticism and appreciation
79. I am grateful to watch some funny Mike Epps comedy tonight
80. I am grateful to have visited the Temple of Joy in Encinitas today to chant some Babaji and Krishna mantras
81. I am grateful to watch some great Nihang Singh Sikh music videos today about the Kirpan and Weapons
82. I am grateful I reached out to my Nonviolent Communication friend Tera today to see about her beginner training and practice groups
83. I am grateful to have a bunch of new Shirdi Sai Baba pictures from the Temple the other day
84. I am grateful I have been getting to know Swami Vishwananda's website and YouTube channel
85. I am grateful I wrote down a list of my writing goals
86. I am grateful I put my Sobriety first
87. I am grateful I met a new Surfer Brother named Manamo today who gave me some teachings and we had a good spiritual discussion too
88. I am grateful I am focused on surrendering drama, narcissistic tendencies, fickleness, self conceit, and haughtiness the last year
89. I am grateful I have an invite to a Sober Thanksgiving Potluck in Encinitas
90. I am grateful for the breath and doing mental mantras with the in breath and the out breath
91. I am grateful to reunite with my bro Eliot from the Kumayay Tribe who I met at the Bear Dance out at the Pala Rez
92. I am grateful the Inner Divine Mother gives me love
93. I am grateful for the humility and bhakti of my surfer bro Swami Shri Dhar
94. I am grateful for the unconditional acceptance of my bhakti comedy brother Swami Adaityananda
95. I am grateful that when it comes to great Authors, its not the quantity, its the quality
96. I am grateful for a good quesadilla with Avacado Salsa
97. I am grateful for how tired I have been feeling at night and being able to go to sleep earlier than usual
98. I am grateful I took a cold plunge at Moon Light Beach today
99. I am grateful I chanted 1000 Guru, Vishwananda, Krishna, Babaji mantras at Moon Light Beach today
100. I am grateful I have been speaking in Wintu to the Native American spirits of the land and making morning cedar offerings with prayers
101. I am grateful for the Heart Light within me
102. I am grateful people give me feedback so that I can learn and grow
103. I am grateful for all my Sober friends
104. I am grateful I give food, clothes, tents, blankets to the homeless whenever I can
105. I am grateful God speaks through people to try to get me to improve my writing and its outlets
106. I am grateful that I won't put up with name calling, physical violence, sexual abuse, and corruption from Hindu Swamis and Sat Gurus
107. I am grateful for all my Native American Bear Dance Elders
108. I am grateful I am working hard for years to cultivate a lot of gratitude
109. i am grateful I listened to a Billy Graham sermon about silence
110. i am grateful for a beautiful Thanksgiving holiday at the Six Step House in Encinitas 
111. i am grateful I am watching documentaries about jail and prisons so I can learn how to be a better volunteer to help relieve the suffering of incarcerated people 
112. I am grateful I have the non-fickle strength to go by Shree Hari which is a tough difficult path fighting dharma battles no one wants to fight and pointing out things that need to be said that nobody wants to say
113. i am grateful my haughty fickle self conceited nature has been wrecked and demolished by sleeping on the ground for 10 years, cleaning the poop/blood/urine of 500+ elders in 8 hospitals, 24 years of handyman labor grunt work, years of being a compost toilet manager having poop urine buckets splash on my arms, 12 years of being a janitor for Amma/Shree Maa choosing the lowest job I could, 14 years of volunteering in 10 jails/prisons, 40 years of volunteering at homeless feeding projects and kitchens, 43 years of sorting recycling/garbage, 5 months of meditation sitting in and face down in full body prostration at Amma's cremation pit in Amritapuri, 8 months of voluntary incarceration for militant social justice dharma war purposes, being punched in the face by 4 major women in my life, 2 and a half years of being homeless in a van, 7 years just having 2 bags of material possessions 
114. I am grateful I work hard to dissolve Hindu Caste Systems even though I am really disliked by some people 
115. I am grateful I have 8 billion friends and family on earth even if some of them hate me and dislike me
116. i am grateful I'd rather be authentic than liked/loved
117. i am grateful I survived six suicide attempts at strangling myself in jail and Isha Nath (Jesus) saved me and I pray to love myself everyday now
118. I am grateful to visit the Poway Sikh Temple again for japa, langar, and seva to help build our new Gurdwara
119. I am grateful I led a Native American Bear Healing song and played drums for the Hanuman Chalisas at the Temple of Joy Ananda Encinitas Satsang today
120. I am grateful for a solid nap today
121. I am grateful I incarcerated my cell phone and my laptop in my storage unit for 48 hours this weekend to go deep inside, enjoy nature, journal, rest and feel what I am feeling 
122. I am grateful for my new beard trimmers 
123. I am grateful to keep educating myself about prisons, hip hop, and Yogic teachings 
124. I am grateful for all the Neem Karoli Baba fiends that I have
125. I am grateful to listen to recent talks from my American Indian Movement elder Uncle Leonard Peltier 
126. I am grateful I work hard to dissolve the Hindu Caste System in USA
127. I am grateful I work hard to educate Hindus about Indigenous Peoples
128. I am grateful I work hard to build restoration justice systems at Hindu Temples even though swamis and Sat gurus are very stubborn with their book agendas
129. i am grateful that no one listens to me and understands me in Amma's and Shree Maa's lineages
130. i am grateful I chose not to murder Amma, Shree Maa, numerous swamis, and Hindus after some perverts in their religion lineage touched my genitals without my consent 
131. I am grateful I've given up blind faith in the Goddess and The Divine Mother after years of sexual abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, and physical abuse carried out by people in Amma's and Shree Maa's lineages
132. i am grateful I've found out that Amma and Shree Maa and their Hindu Swamis are incapable of creating healing circumstances in my life
133. i am grateful I listened to healing Turkish music from my culture today 
134. I am grateful I am in touch with a Publishing Company 
135. I am grateful I bought the book called the Artist Way today to increase my creative writing 
136. I am grateful I never bought a gun to shoot my mouth, face, brains, and heart out as I've contemplated before
137. I am grateful I decided not to lynch myself after the horrible ways I've been treated by Amma's and Shree Maa's lineages
138. i am grateful I've found out that Amma, Shree Maa, and the Divine Mother are merciless, conditionally loving, and unforgiving so I will never ever get involved in Divine Mother worship again and I wasted the last 17 years trying to make Divine Mother worship work out amongst all the rich snobby fickle haughty self conceited people in their lineage
139. i am grateful I've %100 lost my faith in Amma and Shree Maa and that they will save me
140. i am grateful I've found out that Amma and Shree Maa hate restorative justice systems and NVC Practice Groups and I've learned the hard way that I wasted 17 years of my life following these Divine Mothers who deep down hate hate hate with all their heart
141. i am grateful I found out the hard way that Amma, Shree Maa, and Hindu Swamis are unclever and completely incompetent at restorative justice system building, NVC practice groups, trauma healing, social justice, empowering their own people and fulfilling people's dreams 
142. I am grateful I quit Amma's and Shree Maa's lineages because all they do is create more and more trauma, problems, difficulties, duality, suffering, pain, division, war, fighting, and discord
143. i am grateful to find out that Amma's Amritapuri and MA Centers are places that create more trauma than healing and the same is true for Devi Mandir, Kali Mandir, and Lalita Chandika Mandir and all those places brag about injuring and ruining people
144. i am grateful to find out that Kali, Durga, and Chandi are all false idols that don't serve any trauma healing and restorative justice system building visions at all and that Divine Mother worship is the biggest traumatizing waste of time on Earth
145. i am grateful that Shree Maa has threatened to murder me, do black magic on me, beat me and she is the embodiment of felony assault, felony criminal threats, and harassment 
146. I am grateful Amma and Shree Maa came to USA with Hindu Swamis to increase our suffering, make our lives miserable, and ruin our futures
147. I am grateful that Amma and Shree Maa are working together with Amritapuri, MA Centers, Devi Mandir, Kali Mandir, and Lalita Chandika Mandir to punish me for speaking up about my discomfort of receiving multiple sexual batteries from men at their temples
148. i am grateful 988 has saved the lives of many people and prevented many suicides
149. i am grateful I've found out that Kali, Chandi, and Durga are false idols who appear to be friends and are mean vindictive animosity filled gods who came to USA from India to be the cause of ruining people's lives and bringing Americans great misfortune 
150. I am grateful that Swami Ambikananda is one of the meanest Hindus I've ever met and sat behind me in a meeting one time to spy on me and jump me
151. i am grateful that Amma, Shree Maa, Sarada Devi, Sri Ramakrishna, and every single Hindu Swami in USA like Dayamritananda, Bhajananda, Satyananda, Pranavananda, Shatamritananda appears to be a friend but they are really just rich snobs here to back stab people and deepen their traumatic experiences of suffering 
152. I am grateful Hindus are all anti-dialogue, anti-empathy, anti-restorative justice, anti-peacemaking
153. I am grateful that Hindus such as Amma, Shree Maa, Satyananda, Ambikananda, Dayamritananda, Bhajanananda, Surya, Kamalananda, Pranavananda, Amritaswarupananda, Shantamritananda all see me as their enemy and they see themselves as superior, in charge, and ready to coerce/dominate/kill/destroy/hurt/traumatize and ruin as part of their divine mother money making collateral damage 
154. I am grateful it became very clear to me that Amma, Shree Maa, and Hindu Swamis just selfishly use people to make money, have luxury cars, and have luxury mansions and they came to America to disempower people, hurt them, belittle them, ruin them, destroy them, ignore them, fight them, and create a plethora of suffering, trauma, alienation, exclusion, warfare, punishment, animosity, and vindictiveness 
155. I am grateful I've not killed all the mean Hindus on my kill list, who I thought were my friends but have turned out to be the most unkind spiritual teachers I've ever met
156. I am grateful to play Native American Drum for Hanuman Chalisa at the Peace House in Encinitas, CA today
157. I am grateful I sang a Bear Dance Healing Song for the inmates in CA corrections and also to make sure we never have a Hindu Caste System in USA